November 24, 2008
Bad School Pictures
Bad school pictures are a fact of life. There's a sort of looming inevitability to them. Which is why, the morning of Sasha's first grade school picture, I wasn't surprised to see she had woken up with her eyes swollen nearly shut due to some... mystery allergic reaction.
So yeah, I wasn't expecting school pictures that would immortalize my child's enduring beauty as befits it, or anything like that. But you know, I was expecting pictures that looked... you know... a little bit like my child? A low mark, to be sure, which these school pictures yet manage to miss:
Exhibit A, in which Sasha looks... un-Sasha-like
and
Exhibit B, a superior likeness taken in my kitchen with a freaking telephone
Photoshop people, what the heck did they DO to her?!
Just off the top of my head, I can tell they've smoothed out her hair as though it were perfectly straight, and done... something... funny to her forehead and eyebrows. The net effect being that she looks older than she is, and subtly not like herself.
So yeah, we'll be sending her in for the reshoot day, absolutely. But then how do we keep them from doing this kind of awful retouching again? Anyone?